Pain-Free Riding Techniques for Women

Let’s Talk Honestly: Pain-Free Riding Techniques for Women Start With Awareness

Pain-Free Riding Techniques for Women is a topic I’m really passionate about—because honestly, it comes up all the time in therapy sessions and one-on-one coaching. So many Nigerian women avoid riding during sex because it feels painful, awkward, or exhausting.

Hi, I’m Mrs. Olawunmi Esan. I’m a trained psychologist and certified sex therapist. And just like parenting, I believe that great intimacy is something we grow into with the right information, support, and openness.

If you’ve ever felt pressure in your knees, discomfort in your hips, or emotional tension while riding your man, you are not alone. This blog will walk you through pain-free riding techniques for women—so you can enjoy pleasure, connection, and confidence.

Why Riding Can Feel Painful for Many Women

Let’s take a moment to normalize this: pain during sex is more common than we admit. And when it comes to being on top, certain physical and emotional factors can make it even harder.

Common Causes of Discomfort During Riding

• Lack of lubrication – Friction increases discomfort and tightness.

• Incorrect posture – Poor alignment strains your hips, thighs, and lower back.

• Tight pelvic floor muscles – These need stretching and relaxation, not just strength.

• Weak core or leg muscles – Riding uses energy and strength—especially in the thighs.

And beyond the physical, emotional blocks like anxiety or fear of judgment can also cause the body to tense up, making riding even more painful.

Pain-Free Riding Techniques for Women: 5 Expert-Backed Tips

Let me walk you through the most effective techniques that I teach in my sessions and workshops:

1. Use Pillows to Adjust Your Angles

Placing a small pillow under your partner’s hips can elevate the pelvis and make it easier for you to find a comfortable rhythm. You can also sit on a soft pillow yourself to reduce pressure on your knees.

2. Start with Gentle Grinding, Not Bouncing

One of the most important pain-free riding techniques for women is movement choice. Instead of bouncing (which can cause discomfort), try slow circular or back-and-forth motions with your pelvis. These create more clitoral stimulation without pressure.

3. Play with Torso Angles

Leaning forward onto your partner’s chest reduces the load on your legs and engages different pleasure zones like the G-spot. Try leaning in, resting your hands on his chest or bed, and adjusting until it feels right.

4. Breathe and Stay Relaxed

When we hold our breath or tense up, muscles tighten—and pain follows. Deep belly breathing during intimacy relaxes the pelvic floor and keeps your body in rhythm. Let go of needing to perform—just feel and flow.

5. Lubrication is Your Best Friend

Whether your body produces enough or not, always keep a water-based lubricant nearby. It reduces friction and makes every motion smoother and more enjoyable.

💡 Expert Tip: Not all pain is from physical issues. Sometimes, addressing mental and emotional blocks—like guilt, trauma, or low confidence—can dramatically reduce discomfort.

Strengthen These Muscles to Ride Comfortably

Just like you stretch before a workout, strengthening certain muscle groups will transform how you ride—pain-free and with more stamina.

Make these a part of your weekly self-care routine, and your body will start thanking you in the bedroom.

How Emotional Safety Affects Physical Pleasure

This is something I’ve learned both personally and professionally: pain and pleasure are deeply connected to emotional safety. If you feel judged, unseen, or disconnected from your partner, your body may naturally close up.

Create a space of trust:

• Talk openly about your needs and limits.

• Laugh together—don’t take sex too seriously!

• Invite your partner into the learning process.

Remember, pleasure isn’t a performance—it’s a practice.

Real Testimony from a Client

One of my clients, a 34-year-old mother of one, told me after our third session:

“I used to dread riding because of the pain in my knees. But after learning how to grind instead of bounce, and doing those squats you suggested, I actually look forward to it. And my husband has noticed—I’m more confident, and we’re more connected.”

You’re not alone, and your story can change too.

FAQs – Pain-Free Riding Techniques for Women

1. Is it normal for riding to hurt the first few times?
Yes. Like any new physical activity, your body may need time to adjust.

2. What’s the best riding position for beginners?
Modified Cowgirl—leaning forward to reduce leg pressure.

3. How do I deal with thigh pain while riding?
Use pillows and build thigh strength with exercises like squats.

4. Can emotions cause pain during riding?
Absolutely. Emotional tension or lack of safety can cause muscles to tighten.

5. Should I talk to my partner about the pain?
Yes! Communication builds trust and improves the experience for both of you.

6. Can riding lead to orgasms for women?
Yes. Especially when grinding for clitoral stimulation or adjusting angles for G-spot contact.

Final Thoughts from Mrs. Olawunmi Esan

Dear woman, you deserve a pain-free, pleasurable, and confident sexual experience. Pain-free riding techniques for women aren’t about being perfect in bed—they’re about learning your body, embracing your rhythm, and inviting joy into your intimacy.

You don’t have to do this alone. If you’d like personal guidance, join my “Ride Like a Pro Reloaded” course—designed specifically for Nigerian women like you who want to ride without fear, discomfort, or shame.

With warmth and truth,

Mrs. Olawunmi Esan
Psychologist & Certified Sex Therapist